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People are busy these days, overwhelmed with input. It can be hard to get someone’s attention, especially someone you’re attracted to and a little nervous to approach.

Let’s say you see someone appealing and you want to connect with him or her. Start by noticing his or her posture and facial expression, which are easy to see with a glance. Give back his or her facial expression, and stand or sit in a similar posture.

This may seem strange, but what you are actually doing is speaking to his or her subconscious, saying “I’m okay, I’m a lot like you.” This makes the other feel more comfortable, which can lead to more connection.

You can match and mirror facial expression, posture, mannerisms, voice qualities, breathing pace and depth, word choice – people who are like each other tend to like each other, so be like the one you like, and he or she will like you!