Everyone I’ve ever asked wants to have great sex, but most of us have never clearly defined our own sexual preferences, and it’s unlikely that our partner has done the same.
But the only way to come together on what should constitute a particular couple’s sexual practices is to evolve a series of sexual patterns that are fun and fulfilling for both partners.
Once you’ve accomplished a secure foundation of mutual satisfaction, you can safely start to push the envelope, including new behaviors by agreement and accepting the other’s position. No means no, yes means yes, and that way you can experiment without undue pressure.
Notice that lovemaking can change and morph over time, so agree to keep the conversation open, within reason, so you both feel heard, and above all, enjoy the common ground you already have established – you’ll never get bored when you see your partner respond to you.